Yup, I am crazy

As I was running my last training run of 2 miles last night...and that seems ridiculous considering what I had been running... I got to thinking as to why I even signed up for this.

Not sure what I'm talking about??

I signed up for 26.2 miles.

A Marathon.

The girl who HATED running distance in high school. I was a sprinter. I liked going fast for a little bit LOL.

I ran my first half, I want to say 1 1/2 years ago but I might be wrong... it could be longer... Anyway, I ran it and I felt AWESOME. I felt like what the hell, let's go for a full and I bit the bullet and signed up for my first marathon.

After all the GRUELING training runs, bouts of illness, vacation, hip/knee pain, here I am.

But it of course makes me think of how did I get here.

And I know it's because of them.

My children that are no longer here with me.

They taught me that I am WAY stronger than I EVER gave myself credit for.

And while they might not be with me, with me. They are definitely with me. I feel them with the cooling breeze when I feel warm, I feel them when a song pops up on spotify/pandora and gives me a burst of energy or makes me think of them, I feel them when a butterfly/dragonfly fly at me straight on.

Yes 26.2 miles isn't going to be a cake walk, but I've done hard. I've done earth shattering. I CAN do this And know why?? Because they ARE running with me. <3

Good luck to everyone else running in the Lake Front Marathon this Sunday in Milwaukee!! See you there!! If you aren't running and are local, get your booties out there with some crazy whacky signs are cheer us all on for being crazy :)

WOW!

We could NOT have anticipated the chain reaction that took place on Dylan's birthday.

Have you seen the map?!?

Each star represents at LEAST one Random Act of Kindness that was done in Dylan's memory.

How cool is that?!?!

If you haven't already checked out our facebook page, you can find that here and see all the posts and pictures of people placing their RAOK and of people finding the RAOK!!

We would like to thank you for helping us get through the day to everyone that participated :)
There were still tears (at least on my end!) seeing all the RAOK being done and reading the texts and messages I received during the day with the stories of those RAOK. It was an incredible thing to be apart of.

I am not super great at taking compliments (just ask my husband LOL). A few people told me that I am amazing and that I have an incredible heart.

But if you recall, I told Dylan and Noah that I carry their heart(s), I carry them in MY heart. So if you think my heart has super powers, you'd be right.  I carry angel hearts in mine. <3

God bless you all, thank you again for celebrating Dylan's birthday with us!! XOXO

Happy birthday baby boy!

You would've been turning four years old today. Would you be into superheroes like Gabe? Would you love dinosaurs as much as Landon? Would you be talking constantly like me, or more quiet and reserved like daddy? How tall would you be, and would you have kept those amazing cheeks?!

 What movie would you want to watch over and over? What song would make you dance? Sing?


Would you fight us on what you'd wear everyday? Have to dress and feed yourself? How would you be in school? Chatterbox like me lol? I would've told you how many recesses I missed all because of talking during class. And I'll bet you would've listened and you would've played on recess.

Who would we have play dates with? Would you love trains as much as Ro? Would you love the zoo? Which animal would've been your favorite? Would you cry and beg for ice cream? Throw tantrums at target?

I would've loved to have seen you at four. To experience all of it. The good, the bad, and the ugly. ALL of it.

We decided to rally the troops in your honor today kiddo. A lot of people across the country will be doing good things for you today, so keep a look out. And even in another country!! (England thanks to the amazing Shaw family) And they're doing it all because of you kiddo. You made people want to be better. Better mommies. Better daddies. Better wives. Better husbands.


Better people.



You did this. I'm amazed everyday seeing what you've inspired in not only me and daddy, but so many people. People that never had the chance to know you. It makes me so SO proud to be your mommy.

I know you'll see everything that everyone does to celebrate you and your birthday today, but I will share some since kindness is contagious when shared <3 And we want to keep the movement going!!

Your friends Brady and Nathan at Aldi!

My amazing friend Elyse buying dunkin for a stranger <3

Coins for Kiddos

Your Buddy Ben over in England :)

Love you to the moon and back sweetheart! We celebrate you ALWAYS <3
Love,
Mommy

Random Act of Kindness Day in Honor of Dylan

So here it is family and friends: We are planning on doing Random acts of Kindness throughout the day on friday and are encouraging anyone who wants to help, to join us! I created an image that I'm putting on stickers, and making little notecards with that you are welcome to use smile emoticon

Ideas:

Buy the person in line behind you their coffee/bagel/McMuffin with a sticker/note attached smile emoticon
Leave bags of Hershey Kisses in random places with a note attached (in AC!!)
Leave quarters taped to a gumball machine with a note/sticker
Tape a bag of microwave popcorn to a red box machine with a note

No $$ No problem!

Set up a lemonade stand, and hand out free cups for a smile smile emoticon
Leave a cute post-it note (see pic for ideas)

Please then take a picture of your RAOK (if you can...otherwise please just come and tell us about it!) and post it on our D2D facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/devoted2dylan) so we can see all the kindness YOU are spreading in loving memory of our Dylan 

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Falling apart at the seams...

The last few days, I've been really teary...and I sort of just figured that time of the month was coming up (sorry Male readers) but as I was sitting here, crying for the nearly 5th time today it hit. "Duh, you idiot!"

It's so crazy how feelings and emotions of love, pain, grief (and others but these are mine right now) can just take over. You can fight it for only so long, and then it overflows. And even oozes out of your pores.

Crying is healthy and a release, sometimes I just wish I had more control of when it over takes me, lol.

It might be hard for some to understand why Mother's day is one of the worst holidays for me. But their birthdays are full of joy for me. It's the day I met them, face to face.  The day they passed away, well that day is the same as Noah's birthday and we choose to celebrate getting to hold our precious boy for those two hours he was here on Earth with us. The day we said goodbye to Dylan, while sad, was also wonderful. Dylan got to go home. He was able to leave the hospital and all the beeping behind him, feel the sun and be held by his immediate family and hear countless times how loved he was.

And not that I don't have a reminder every.single.day. that they aren't here...because I do, but Mother's day is like pouring a bottle of salt in an open wound.

So please keep me, and other mother's (ALL mothers!) in your thoughts and prayers on Sunday.

bereaved mother's day

Our walk is THIS Saturday!!

REALLY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
PLEASE SHARE with Milwaukee D2D walkers!

We have a team photo team scheduled with the photographer at 920 am. Please be in your green and ready before then if you want to be in the team picture this year!!! So try to be there at 9ish! We will be there!!!

The walk is in the same location as in previous years:

Date: Saturday, April 25, 2015 

Start time: 10:00 AM

Registration time: 9:00AM

Walk distance: 2 miles

O'Donnell Park

931 E. Wisconsin Ave.
Milwaukee, WI 53202

(414) 778-3500 | WI657@marchofdimes.org